It is still so raw. I find myself wondering if now is the time to write the words, to bring back the memories. There were joys and laughter, but then it all erupted into drama and tears. In the wine stupor I am now forced to live, I recall Spring Break 2014. The 12 days, 288 straight hours, 1,440 minutes of my life I lived 100% of the time with children. Take a trip? No, he says. Take off a few day? No, he says. Decide for the first time in your life to become totally in need of alone time and self-reflection? Why, yes, he says. That sounds nice. I will look totally inward, sleep endless hours, take time to namaste and zen. Only for a few days, he says. Only the Sunday night Spring Break is over, he says. I am a martyr. Yes, there is no other humble way to describe it. A martyr.
So, I am at the last day of school before Spring Break field trip and listening to the trips Alden's classmates are taking for the week... INDIA, HAWAII, DISNEY WORLD, my parent's lake house...and then there is Alden. So, do you know what makes up for not taking your child to India for Spring Break? Pinterest! Yes! Let's start off the week by making the alphabet...out of Legos....in the form of animals...and then putting it on the train. Hawaii, please, who needs it.
We moved on to painting egg carton/toilet paper trains for Spencer's happiness. My plan was really not to include Harrison in any of this but Harrison had another opinion. Alden painted the train perfectly. Spencer mixed up all his paint colors and painted the entire train what was now a puke brown only to look up at Alden's train and decide that the mixing was a bad idea. He wanted to start over with his paint. I gave him Harrison's since zero paint actually made it onto his train.
Harrison spent the entire time painting his left hand. I am assuming that most all of the one year old mother's day out art involves some sort of handprint art and he was, therefore, robotically trained to not paint anything on the table and only on his person. As crazy as it sounds, this was actually a very calm and successful activity.
I was feeling so good about myself at this point that I decided we would work on some academic skills. I discovered three things. First, Spencer really loves to learn. His perception while he was tracing his little lines in all kinds of various directions it was not supposed to go was that it was practically perfect in every way which is fine by me if it makes him keep tracing his little lines. However, he is much more interested in learning if the workbook pages include trains. We have now completed train letters, train phonics, train shapes, train colors, and train math. His pediatrician assures me this is not odd at all and it will probably just pass. Seriously? Because it ain't passion' quickly. Lastly, I discovered that Harrison is super annoying during learning time. He loves to color, but only on the workbooks of his big brothers. No matter how many times I put the Elmo coloring book in front of him, he would push it away and color on anything but the coloring page. Crayons are also a nice snack. Homework tables are perfect for practicing your basic training skills for the baby army.
Believe it or not, I actually decided to go ahead with my science and art lesson plans for the week. Teacher nerds do write lesson plans for Spring Break. Time for lava lamps!
Earlier in the year, Alden's name was not drawn from his class to attend the special science and math class. Each month, the whole school completes a math calendar and turns it into the science and math enrichment teacher. She draws one name from the completed pile per class. Ellis got to make a lava lamp and that just really ticked him off. He had months worth of angry passion built up for this.
Alden and Spencer (who I was a little unsure of holding food coloring) did a splendid job with as much interest and concentration and listening skills they could possibly give me. So, now it has been proved those skills do exist.
Once again, let me say how much I did not anticipate Harrison participating in this activity. Giving my one year old food coloring and vegetable oil gave me visions of boys ice skating across the kitchen floor when he randomly decided to pour it out. I might have also saw a whole lot of green, ruined laundry. However, we pulled it through....until the next morning. I put the finished lava lamps way up on top of the counter pushed as far back as they would go because I am not stupid. And yet, he made a fool of me yet when I found that he had pushed a stool to the counter and was swimming in the sink covered in oil and water (his version of a density experiment). Fortunately, we did not have to call poison control, however, we did have a substantial green poo diaper.
This might have been the absolute best idea I have ever found on the internet. The pool noodle race track. The big boys had a blast for all of about 30 whole minutes, which in tiny people world is akin to something like nine hours, so it was wonderful. Harrison spent a few moments crying when he was accidentally Hot Wheels road kill, but for the most part, he loved all the action and being the retriever of all the cars. The way you know that this activity is over is when the cars start flying over the stairwells and the pool noodles swipe you across the back of the head. However, filed away for future use for sure.
Now, we still haven't had lunch nor have we bothered to put on actual clothing, but we are onto the next activity of possibly the longest Pinterest inspired morning in the history of the world. Those moms that blog about there little activity boxes that entertain their kids on rainy days are totally full of crap because there is no way that any one activity lasts for longer than twenty minutes in my house without becoming some sort of Zanex moment. After the wilds of the pool noodle race, we went back to the learning table. Alden actually was super-Kindergarten-trained and worked on his little math Lego packet I had given him. Spencer refused, once again, to do anything that did not involve trains or glue. I spent a frantic time period printing and searching the internet and running up and down stairs to retrieve papers for him to cut and paste. I will say, he did well for the actual academic part, however, glue. Oh, the glue. Harrison also loved the glue. Harrison also loved to dump out crayons. Harrison also liked to "color" on all the papers. Harrison also liked to play with the scissors and tell me that they would "hurt baby." Can you tell I say this often? Can you tell that Harrison does not realize that he is, in fact, THE BABY in which I am referring??
Day Two needed a Plan B activity. Since our family of five pretty much never leaves our neighborhood, let alone our city, it is hard to find something that all three ages can do that we do not do all the time. Museum of Art it is! Harrison flitted and floated from activity to activity.
No one was particularly interested in making the noise shaker project. I mean, I wasn't exactly sure how fun it was myself. Masking tape two cups together with some beads and then use more masking tape to decorate. Sounded like some silly Pinterest activity some stay -at-home Mom would try to entertain her kids for Spring Break....
Drawing on the pottery was totally fun. I think it made them feel mischievous.
The magic boards were great except that Spencer kept wanting to email all his photos to alskdjfalskdjflaskjdfalskjdf email address (yes, that is what he typed every time) and Alden was sort of annoyed that Harrison kept changing his colors and erasing his work (yes, totally legit that he was annoyed). Know what it means when the going gets tough? Move on to next room.
They were cute, they were precious, they had a blast. We played with shapes and puppets and even made Native American treasure boxes. The boxes involved glue and scissors and no one was injured or furniture ruined! We had a small moment when Alden's temporary tattoo did not look quite as good as Spencer's temporary tattoo, but we snagged one to take home for later...which ended up in the washing machine.
As any old lady would tell me, "You need to get those boys outside!" And that is what we tried to do. Spencer was a little too young for the official T-ball team this year, but after knocking it in a straight line time and time again off the plastic toy tee, I have high hopes for his summer YMCA T-ball future.
Talk about cracking me up. This little one. Harrison is all the time doing things that are so practical without being asked. He decided on his own that he would play outfield. When Spencer hit, he ran and retrieved the ball and brought it back to the tee and carefully backed away. Just love him!
Alden got jealous and wanted to show us how a REAL T-ball player does it.
Harrison tried to put those lessons to good use.
Park day!! We walked up to the neighborhood playground with our friends and had a swell time. Harrison has ridiculous upper body strength.
Ain't afraid of a good tummy slide.
And will climb anything you give him the change to try.
I had some very, very happy boys.
Alden did get in a bit of trouble from picking fights with the two year old girl. Seriously? But, sadly for him and awesome-sauce for her, I think she won.
Our ego remains untouched. We can take a little defeat.
Oh, look! Another fabulous Mommy art/science Pinterest project. I mean, the week is going so well and everyone has gotten along for the most part and Mommy is actually looking forward to summer break.
I am not sure what to say about this. I mean, on the one hand, Spencer literally, not in tiny people time, played in this man-made snow for two hours. He loved it. He got trucks and trains and hands and was just in heaven. Now, here is the other hand. Corn starch and shaving cream. It sort of just became a disaster of gargantuan proportion when it comes to clean. This is one of those things only I am stupid enough to do and Joey would rather die than complete. It took me "a hundred years" as Alden says to clean this mess up. Towels, rags, vacuums, baths for boys, baths for cars, brooms, and a lot of elbow grease. And if anyone thinks anything but chaos was occurring while Mom was cleaning we all know we are kidding ourselves. I am tired and things are starting to go downhill. I have to admit that as the month between Spring Break and this post has lapsed, I don't remember exactly the terror and my mind has blocked out the pain like they say women block out the pain of childbirth (I wouldn't know, but I hear). However, I am almost positive I remember a lot of yelling, fighting, and that I ended up somehow becoming "the worst!!" by the end of the day.
Good thing there is always a Target trip to get your mind off the bad things. So, Spring Break wasn't all that bad...except for that one day...and the days that followed. We have traced some of the horrific behavior to TV and sugar, both of which have all but been eliminated and life is getting easier. I kid you not, my five year old can watch one Saturday morning of the CW cartoons or Star Wars cartoons and turn into some sort of raging kung fu nightmare. My four year old can raid one too many stashed away treats and turn into a teenage girl at a bad time of the month who has broken up with her boyfriend. It ain't easy convincing Spencer that flax seed muffins are a great snack or Alden that Max and Ruby is just as awesome as Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, but we are at least half a step ahead of them right now which I will take.
Real T-ball has begun for the eldest of our tribe. He is doing a great job. For some reason, one night game, T-ball clicked. It was like this light bulb turned on and he really plays, really hits, really pays attention, and has real dirt stains from playing and not from searching for ants. Best of all he loves it and is living up to the number I requested...
Number 9, of course, because one of these boys needs to be Roy Hobbs...
Because, well, my pajama shirt just says it all.
Sadly though, his is how we ended our week. The park or the museum or Target kicked poor little Spencer out of the game for a while. The stomach bug King told me that he was sick and that he needed to go to his throw up spot. This is the one time that Spencer is totally meticulous. He must do the following or that teenage girls shows up: the same side of the sofa, a towel, the trash can from the downstairs bathroom and no other trash can or receptacle, a pillow, chugga the giraffe, the Tweetsie Railroad cup filled with Gatorade, and Peppa Pig all day long.
Guess who turned 4! We celebrated Spencer's big day with birthday pancakes and happy birthday. the fact that he was able to eat sprinkles for breakfast might have been the best birthday present ever imagined.
Alden helped me make a cookie cake with some stellar decorations.
Spencer's grandfather wanted him to have his big present on his actual birthday.
Someone was just a tiny bit happy to have his first big boy HO gauge electric train! It even had an oil car and a caboose which made it all the better for the young engineer. He says, "I am all about these choo chop tracks!" He had picked out this train at the local toy store he calls the Teddy Bear Train Store because of the pictures on the sign out front. He kept taking it up to the check out and telling me to buy it. I told him that I could not buy it because Daddy wasn't with us and we would have to talk about it. Not thinking, we met Daddy up the street for lunch. Walking back to the car, Spencer is so excited and happy. It didn't take long to realize that in his mind we had met Daddy for lunch so that we could go and buy a train! The messes I create for myself sometimes! Good thing grandparents come to the rescue in a pinch and come up with the same idea as their little mini's.
Time for some of those high-dolla decorations.
And a good ole Spencer sugar rush!
Well, duh, Dad. Of course you have to put it together THAT night. What were you thinking when you suggested tomorrow!
No, my sweet baby peanut, you cannot take your Steamie to bed with you, but I hope that you dream about it when you "go into your eyes" as you love to say.
When the weekend finally came rolling around, we had our birthday party. Spencer was very specific that it would be at a cafe near railroad tracks and that he had to invite everyone in his class at mother's day out. So, that is what we did. It went not really at all as I had planned which made it the most totally perfect little party. Sometimes the kids just know how to do it all by themselves when you give them the tools.
Brothers wearing there "eyebrows."
Party supplies! Now, the night before...yes, the night before the party, I decided to try all the hats I had made on Spencer just to double check the fit. They don't! Not by a long shot. It is pouring rain, but I drag everyone in 5:00 traffic to JoAnn's fabric because there is simply no turning back at this point. Logic would say, just don't have hats for the party but that is not how I operate. So, one terrible, horrible, no good, very bad trip to JoAnn's that ended in major yelling, catastrophe, and one lost and found birthday child, I came home to sew. Season 1 of some Netflix Scandal, a couple of catch up episodes of Parenthood, and a little bit of Hunger Games later...voila, hats that fit at 3:00 am. They were actually huge because by golly I would rather them fall down on their faces that not go on their heads a second time.
Cafeteria line birthday parties are the best.
Best friends train watching.
Coloring train puzzles after dinner.
Eating...unless a train comes by!
Big trains and little trains are friends. The number 4 engine lead his train parade.
Decorating mini train car cakes.
Only magic would have made train whistles blow right at the end of Spencer's birthday song followed by a seemingly constant flow of diesel Norfolk Southerns. It could not have been better if we had bribed the train company or been on a movie set. Perfection.
The Piñata that begged to be beaten to death before letting go of its loot!
Some little man I know and his Piñata prizes.
Big brothers are wonderful at helping open presents. Even if they do look like they are channeling Stanley Kowalski and about to shout, "Stelllllaaaaa!!!" from the train platform.
All brothers are great at plotting how they are going to steal the preferred gifts for themselves when no one is looking.
Apparently, the parents weren't looking.
Seriously???! Both hands!
One happy birthday boy. One happy train man.
One pooped little guy.
Spencer peanut you are a big ole loving mess. You sneak all the food out of our kitchen and drive us crazy and then sneak into our bed in the middle of every night and are promptly forgiven with your cuddles. You are a quiet observer and not a big talker, but when you do speak, your questions are profound and your thoughts plentiful. Mostly about trains and God, two things I am happy to have you ponder and which you are very talented of mixing together when you are in Sunday School. You know more than is imaginable about both. You would live outside in the sandbox if we let you, but would find some way to make a giant mess of yourself and something in the yard. We would once again hide our laughter as we tried to convince you that your teacher did not tell you that if you say you are sorry that means you do not have to go to time out. You will never, ever get enough sugar to please you. You will eat Spinach and carrot smoothies, but will not touch a piece of meat or anything that feels foreign to you. You will eat pizza until the cows come home, but will not touch anything that looks like a tomato. You always have dirt under your fingernails which reminds me that you are all boy! Your curls and your grin will melt the world--and apparently have already made you the preschool heartthrob. Your hugs melt your Mommy who is privileged enough to still be your best gal for a little while longer. You are an adoring younger brother and are starting to figure out this older brother thing with great gusto and kindness. You are one special little middle.
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